Photo by Tanya Pro on Unsplash

Life moves pretty fast. Time turns in a blink of an eye, stealing youth from our bones. People are running in chaos, not even sparing you a glance. And there you are, standing still in a sea of people, daunted by the rapid changes around you. It’s been a year, and you feel stuck. Everyone is achieving something when you are not. You wanted to shout “Stop!” so the world would wait for you, but your voice felt heavy like the burden you carried.

But you’re not stuck. You are moving at your own pace, one foot in front of the other, and you keep moving forward. Now look back. Realize how far you’ve come and give yourself a pat on the shoulder for surviving this year. You’ve done it well and you’ll continue to grow radiantly next year too.

--

--

She’s not pretty like that. She’s not pretty like a perfect porcelain doll that’s sitting quietly on the glass shelf for people to see. She is pretty like a slash of thunder that shakes you for a brief moment. She is pretty like a fire crackling and dancing so fiercely. She is pretty like a mist that slowly swallows you whole. She is pretty like a wildflower on the roadside.

She is pretty like that, effortlessly, fearlessly, just by being.

--

--

Dan suatu hari nanti, di saat keberanian datang untuk menemanimu, aku harap kamu bisa memilih sesuatu yang benar-benar kamu inginkan. Tanpa paksaan, tanpa tuntutan, tanpa penyesalan.

Jiwamu akan dipanggil oleh melodi-melodi semesta yang mengajakmu untuk berdansa, untuk meninggalkan riuh pikuk dunia sementara, dan memilih untuk berbahagia. Dan apa pun pilihanmu, jika itu memang berasal dari hati, aku berdoa semoga kamu akan berakhir di tempat yang jauh lebih baik daripada hari ini. Di tempat di mana hatimu perlahan membaik dan ragamu tidak mengeluh lelah lagi. Secepatnya.

--

--

Photo by Aman Upadhyay on Unsplash

And she finally feels the changes in her life after you left her in despair. She laughs wholeheartedly again. She’s now singing the broken-up songs without tearing up. She can do things you both used to do without thinking about you. She’s okay with remembering you because now there’s no bitter feeling and regret, only relief and hope for better days.

--

--

In this fast-paced modern world, with hustling as a culture that is viewed as a normal thing, I hope you remember to disconnect sometimes. Turn off your screen and stare at the raindrops that hitting your windows. Walk outside, and listen to the bird and rustling leaves. Read a book slowly, devour every word, and take notes. Annoys your cat by patting its head many times. Watch sunrises, letting your stress and worry melt as the sun climbs higher in the sky. Or simply lay down on your bed, doing nothing, pretending that your bedroom ceiling is a sky full of stars.

You deserve a break. You deserve more time to listen to your thoughts. You deserve to live your life at your own pace. Don’t let the world steal that from you.

--

--

And what if I will never experience love like they said I would? What if I am destined to be forever alone? What if the love song is just a song, and the romance movie is just a fragment of hopeless romantic imagination? What if there’s no true love and Cinderella was wrong? What if the happily ever after is just a childish hope that will never come true?

- Would I still be happy then?

--

--

Photo by Sasha Freemind on Unsplash

She’s a ten, but she’s crying herself to sleep. She’s a ten but has trust and anger issues. She’s a ten, but she avoids looking in the mirror because she always finds something she doesn’t like about her appearance. She’s a ten, but she still falls in love too deeply with fictional characters. She’s a ten, but she feels too much. She’s a ten but believes she’s never good enough for anyone. She’s a ten but gives her love to the wrong guy. She’s a ten but thinks she’s a two. She’s a ten, but she overthinks everything. She’s a ten, but she delivers her feeling quietly through poems. She’s a ten, but society makes her believe she’s not worth it. But nevertheless, she’s a ten, a wonderful woman, and one of a kind.

--

--

Photo by Zhivko Minkov on Unsplash

And she wondered,

How does it feel to be looking at yourself in the mirror without wanting to change anything about yourself? Not your hair, smile, teeth, nose, or everything else?

How does it feel to be looking at yourself without wanting to disappear? Without wanting to break down and cry?

How does it feel to be pretty and actually believe it?

--

--

Photo by Jingyi Lyu on Unsplash

I will stop expecting people to treat me the way I want to be treated. I will stop expecting them to smile back at me when I smile at them. I will stop expecting them to give me a bouquet of my favorite flowers and buy it myself instead. I will stop expecting them to reply to my kindness with their kindness, my love with their love. I will set my boundaries, but even so, it doesn’t mean I will stop giving them my best intentions. I will shine like a star for them, even though they will forget me as soon as the sun lights up the sky.

Because not everyone has a heart as I do, and I will let go of the burden of my expectations, so I won’t get disappointed anymore.

--

--